November Pass Or Pages Entry #5

Time for our favorite part of Pass Or Pages, the feedback reveals! We hope that everyone following along will get something out of these reveals that they can apply to their own writing. I did!
We are so grateful to our agent panel for critiquing these entries. We would also like to give a shout-out to the authors for being brave and willing to improve.

Entry #5: DEAR MR. PRESIDENT    

Query:

DEAR MR. PRESIDENT is a middle-grade epistolary[CG1] novel[CG2] completed at 34,000[CG3] words. It will appeal to readers of Dear Mr. Henshaw and The Naked Mole Rat Letters.[RP1]

When the Dunlap family receives a letter of condolences from the President of the United States—for the war the president started in which eleven-year-old Spencer’s father died—Spencer writes him back to tell him he is the worst president in history. To Spencer’s surprise, the president[CG4] replies and an unlikely friendship is born.[CG5]

While Spencer and the president correspond with each other via letters and emails, the Speaker of the House initiates impeachment proceedings against the president for enacting a raid on an orphanage hiding [CG6]the enemy dictator: the same mission in which Spencer’s father died. Spencer stumbles across letters sent by his father before embarking on the raid. In the letters, Spencer’s father admits he ordered the attack, not the president. Now Spencer must choose whether to share the letters that could exonerate the[CG7] president or keep them secret to preserve his father’s reputation.[RP2]

**********


Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1] Nice comps

[RP2] There’s a LOT of plot introduced in this paragraph. It’s so tough to know what to include in a query, and how to pace it. I might include the detail about the president being in trouble in the last paragraph, and focus this one on Spencer finding evidence that his father had a hand in the mission. Something to suggest the serious nature of the story (or more like the big scope) before the end of the query. But I would keep reading.


Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] I like that you open with a context-giving paragraph. I would also include a one-line pitch of your novel in this paragraph. Something about the President as pen pal

[CG2] I had an editor tell me recently that she thought epistolary novels were overdone. I would research this potentially flooded market and make it a priority to show how your book is not a tired concept and can succeed.

[CG3] Feels low but I would overlook this normal red flag bc of its epistolary nature, which lends to a lower word count. But something to consider.

[CG4] Cool concept.

[CG5] I would add one line about the nature of this friendship – does the President joke with him, tell him personal secrets, etc? Part of the hook of this book, I think, so important to include.

[CG6] an the

[CG7] Sounds like a good core conflict that has high stakes


First 250:

July 30



Dear President Shepherd:

I hate you. You're a terrible president. If it weren't for you, my dad would be home and alive. Why did you start the stupid war in the first place?[CG1]

What if I sent your dad somewhere and he died. How would you feel? Probably rotten, just like I do now. Mom cries all the time and stopped going to work after the Marines came to the house to tell her dad died. My grandma and grandpa are here to take care of me since Mom is too sad to do it.

Grandpa said he voted for you, but that was a mistake. He won’t ever vote for you again. He thinks your war is stupid, but he didn’t say stupid. I can’t repeat the word he said without getting my mouth washed out with soap.

Mom stopped eating. All she does is cry and wears Dads old t-shirts.[RP1] Do you think your stupid letter telling us you were sorry would make anything different? It didn’t. Your letter can’t bring back Dad and that’s the only thing that would make us feel better.

The funeral is on Saturday. All my family will be there along with some Marines that served with Dad. Grandpa said if Mom is too sad to grab the flag from the Marines than I should take it, look the soldier in the eyes, give him a firm handshake, and thank him. That is what I’ll do.[CG2]

**********


Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1] If the whole book will be told in Spencer’s letters, I would want a sense right away that you’ll be able to tell a fleshed-out narrative in that format. Everything in this sample is essentially summary and exposition, and so I would worry about the voice going forward. For instance, these two details could be expanded into paragraphs, a whole memory of Spencer’s mother—I would need to see something like that to convince me to read on, so if such a moment exists in this letter, I would suggest moving it up.


Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] This is almost too simple here. I wish it was a bit more nuanced to make it more compelling.

[CG2] A cool concept and interesting plot line, but I think the writing feels a bit too straightforward to me. Being an epistolary novel, the book has structural limitations, so you have to be really thoughtful with language so you can use what you have to give clues about the character’s personality and emotions, things that are left unsaid like events or reactions. I think this reads a little too “on the nose” for me.

**********

Results:

Rebecca Podos: PASS
Clelia Gore: PASS

November Pass Or Pages Entry #4

Time for our favorite part of Pass Or Pages, the feedback reveals! We hope that everyone following along will get something out of these reveals that they can apply to their own writing. I did!
We are so grateful to our agent panel for critiquing these entries. We would also like to give a shout-out to the authors for being brave and willing to improve.

Entry #4: EVERYDAY ELLIE[CG1]

Query: [CG2]

Ellie’s[CG3] beloved dog Rosie needs an operation. Mom says surgery is too expensive, but Ellie won’t take no for an answer.[CG4]

Her money-making plan?

YouTube.

After Ellie buys a camera and tri-pod, she starts Everyday [CG5] Ellie, a channel focusing on DIY crafts. With the opportunity to make money from advertising[CG6], Ellie hopes to give Rosie a new chance at life.

Without her mother’s knowledge, Ellie grows her channel. She gains admirers, including a talent agent who encourages her to film a sponsorship video. Three days after emailing the video, the agent promises to meet Ellie at the county fair.

It’s Ellie’s chance to make it big as a YouTuber and earn money for Rosie’s operation, yet something doesn’t feel quite right.

Especially when the agent tells Ellie to come alone.[RP1][CG7]

My middle grade contemporary manuscript EVERYDAY ELLIE is complete at 57,000 words[CG8]. Thank you for your consideration.

Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1] I really like this query for the most part—it tells me who Ellie (with the DIY crafts) what she wants the most (for Rosie to get her operation) and what she’ll do to get it. I would wonder what you mean by “sponsorship video,” and would want that cleared up, but would keep reading. My one reservation: this sentence is really ominous. I would want a little better idea where this was headed, so I was prepared, if that makes sense.


Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] I would consider retitling something that has more compelling or strong implications or allusions. This is a rather neutral title that doesn’t do anything to make a reader interested in reading. Even “Ellie Everyday” would be a bit more compelling – but I think there is probably a better title out there!

[CG2] Introduce your query – title, audience, word count, a one line pitch should precede your longer pitch,

[CG3] We need a little more contextual information, perhaps a personality trait or at last her age.

[CG4] This introduction makes me think that the books skews to the younger middle grade audience.

[CG5] Retitle for same reasons.

[CG6] This sounds like an upper middle grade concept and doesn’t jibe with the opening sentence to me.

[CG7] Ack! A compelling final cliff hanger. Again, there is some back and forth here re: who the target audience is – I can’t tell whether this is meant for lower or upper middle grade. The language and some of the plot points feel more juvenile, but other plots points feel more mature.

[CG8] High word count for a lower middle grade audience. An agent would note this because it’s a sign that either the author isn’t super savvy about the business of publishing and the word count expectations, or that the book hasn’t been fully edited yet.


***********

First 250:

Filming a decent video wasn’t supposed to be this hard. I held up my phone, panned around my bedroom, and described my crafts: The pink and blue dresser drawers I decorated with leftover paint from the basement, the pillow I designed by hot gluing yarn to form the word “Smile”, and my headboard, which I created by painting foam boards with chalkboard paint.

“What do you think, Rosie girl?” I helped my dog onto my bed and stroked her snowy curls. “Think I could put my videos up on YouTube like Crafty Carlie?”

Rosie tucked her head to her furry chest.

“I know. Mine are awful.” I replayed my video. It was blurry and the sound was muffled, probably because Dad bought me an old-model phone after Mom yelled that no way on God’s green Earth could we afford a fancy schmancy iPhone, since, according to her, I just needed to send an occasional text or call 9-1-1 if the house was on fire.

“Ellie?” Mom knocked before peeking inside my bedroom. She clutched her grocery store coupon organizer, a purple accordion file.

I buried my phone under my Smile pillow.

“What are you up to?”

“Nothing.”

Mom gripped her coupons. “Can you help me pick beans? I need to get to the store.” Inside my head I could still hear Mom screaming that money didn’t grow on trees, and how extras—like the expensive dog food Dad bought to help Rosie’s stiff joints—was way outside our budget.[RP1]

[CG1]

Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1] I like the voice in this sample, and how her mother is introduced, and that money is a real factor in their lives, which introduces rich potential for conflict. I would read on!


Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] I feel sort of neutral about the writing as well. I would consider using a passage that showed off a strong voice or a compelling protagonist a little more.

**********

Results:

Rebecca Podos: I’d be happy to request the first three chapters of EVERYDAY ELLIE. PAGES

Clelia Gore: PASS

November Pass Or Pages Entry #3

Time for our favorite part of Pass Or Pages, the feedback reveals! We hope that everyone following along will get something out of these reveals that they can apply to their own writing. I did!
We are so grateful to our agent panel for critiquing these entries. We would also like to give a shout-out to the authors for being brave and willing to improve.

Entry #3:  JUNKYARD DOG

Query:

Living[CG1] in an Italian/Spanish neighborhood has its advantages, and twelve-year-old Mitch knows how to maneuver his way around the hood. If Rat Ears and No Neck hadn’t played a school prank earning him[CG2] the nickname Skeletor Mitch, he wouldn’t have accepted their challenge to compete at a treacherous game of JUNKYARD DOG. But the idea of besting them and winning the prize, the school’s Marshal Badge, has its perks. For one thing, he’ll end their reign of terror. Humiliating the thugs[CG3] will be sweet. But the idea of losing is painful—he’d be labeled the biggest dork ever.[RP1]

Enlisting the help of his best friends, things don’t go as planned and instead of gaining supporters, Mitch ends up the underdog. On top of that, all efforts to win over the Bullmastiff that guards the junkyard of creepy old movie props backfire.

Its doomsday Monday, the street has been blocked off; the drones are ready to go live on Snap Chat, and the whole school shows for the event of a lifetime—including the mafiosos.[RP2] Armed with a glow in the dark watch, a bag of cat food, his lucky chicken legs, and a treasure map, he sets off on a scavenger hunting adventure. When the game goes awry, Mitch has to choose: save the lives of his sworn enemy and lose or go for the gold.[CG4]

MG JUNKYARD DOG 56k-words[CG5]

**********

Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1] I have a lot of questions about what’s going on in this paragraph, because there’s a lot of plot. What does living in an Italian/Spanish neighborhood have to do with the skillset Mitch needs, and what does he need it for? What is Junkyard Dog? Is Skeletor Mitch a bad name (it seems better than Rat Ears.) What kind of game is Junkyard Dog, and what’s a Marshal badge? Piquing an agent’s curiosity is good, but you don’t want to confuse them by throwing too much down at once. I would be cautious going forward.

 [RP2] I might stop reading here, because I wouldn’t know what was happening. I thought this game was just between him and the bullies like a dare, but now the town seems to be involved (blocking off the street) and the drones make me think this is sci-fi, though Snap Chat seems like a strange forum for this, and I don’t know where the mafiosos came from. And I still don’t know what this game is, that it requires a treasure map. There are some cool elements here, but in a query I look for who a character is, what they want and what’s at stake, and I’m not sure of any of that. So it would make me wary of what story I was getting into.

Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] I always recommend starting with an introductory paragraph that includes contextual information plus a one line pitch that includes your hook and will get a reader interested in knowing more.

[CG2] This sentence construction is off because, as written, the earnings of the prank should be imputed the Rat Ears and No Neck, which, after two or three reads, I realized is not what you mean to say here.

[CG3] I’d use a different word.

[CG4] You are including too much of a plot in this pitch. It’s coming off as too complex for the pitch. Remember, the pitch is not a synopsis, but a selling document. So take the most compelling parts of your book and the necessary plot points and context – you don’t need to unveil the entire story. Try to cut this down to one paragraph. Read flap/jacket copy on books to get a better idea of how to do this well.

[CG5] This should be rolled into the text of the pitch more naturally.

First 250:

Mitch shook the hatchling lizard from its waxy bag into the terrarium, and counted the seconds it would take Sam, his pet python, to snag it with his killer fangs. The lizard’s tiny legs sped across the tank’s glass walls. On twelve, the python’s yellow head shot like an arrow, snaring the crawler into his mouth.[CG1]

“Whoa. That lizard didn’t stand a chance. You’re fast, buddy.”

Sam slithered lazily into his pool.

Outside his bedroom window Kurt hollered. “Yo, Mitch! You up there?”

Kurt said he’d be coming by at noon. The Batman clock on his nightstand had both hands pointed to twelve. Mitch pulled the curtains aside and poked his head out. “Hey, man.”

“We’re late. Hurry or all the free food will be gone.” He flipped his skateboard and held the Zero like a torch. “Break out your board, we’re rolling.”

If he moved any slower, Kurt would know he’d been dragging his feet. “Sure.” Mitch checked his iPhone.[CG2] No calls or texts. No news is good news. “I’ll be right down.”

Mitch slid closed the feeder door of the terrarium. “Sam, I’m late for an event.” He pressed his nose to the tank. “Have you ever been pushed into doing something you’ll regret? No. Why would you? You’ve got superhero strength. Who wouldn’t be scared of you? ” He sighed. “See ya, buddy.”

He loved bowling parties, but didn't want to run into a certain two morons from school.[CG3]

**********

Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] A jarring initial image, some kids could be turned off by it. Consider whether this opening has a bigger purpose—does it demonstrate a character trait about Mitch or his life that will have importance later on or in the entire book, or is this just included for hooking in or shocking the reader on page 1. Ideally, you want a balance of both.

[CG2] Try to speak about technology as generally as possible – you want your book to still be around for years to come, and who knows if kids of the future will know what an iPhone is. Do kids of today know what  Blackberry is? Definitely not.

[CG3] Writing is solid, but I leave not totally hooked. Working on a sharper, more compelling query will make an agent want to read on even if they aren’t totally connecting at first with the sample writing.

Results:

Rebecca Podos: PASS

Clelia Gore: PASS

November Pass Or Pages Entry #2

Time for our favorite part of Pass Or Pages, the feedback reveals! We hope that everyone following along will get something out of these reveals that they can apply to their own writing. I did!
We are so grateful to our agent panel for critiquing these entries. We would also like to give a shout-out to the authors for being brave and willing to improve.

Entry #2: THE BITTERNESS OF COCOA BEANS[CG1]

Query:

When making a choice between saving a life and rescuing his neighbors’ crops, 12-year-old Tau[CG2] accidentally sets fire to his African village.[CG3] He loses all hope of gaining acceptance among the villagers who consider his deafness a sign of dangerous unintelligence. Only his brother, Sam, shields him from abuse and encourages the villagers to give Tau another chance. When Sam is taken by a child trafficker[RP1], Tau will risk anything to find him.

With only one clue left behind—a burlap bag with a mysterious symbol—Tau follows their tire tracks to the nearby city of Bamako, Mali.[CG4] He loses the trail and finds himself lost and afraid until he meets Koowa, a Hard-of-Hearing girl with albinism. She not only introduces him to Deaf culture, she secures his job in a candy shop. While he’s working in the store, a matching burlap sack filled with cocoa beans arrives with the supply shipment. He discovers the darker side of chocolate and, more importantly, Sam’s location: a cocoa plantation south of Mali.

Koowa agrees to help Tau rescue his brother, but in sight of their goal they are stopped by the border patrol. Stranded, they realize abduction by the same child trafficker who took Sam is their only ticket into Cote d’Ivoire—a place where children go to never return.[CG5]

THE BITTERNESS OF COCOA BEANS is an Upper Middle-Grade Contemporary complete at 35,000 words [RP2] [CG6]. The tone is similar to The Bitter Side of Sweet but maintains a focus on Deaf culture like the TV show Switched at Birth.[CG7]

***********

Rebecca's Notes: 
[RP1] There’s a lot of plot in this first paragraph: a life in danger, a burned-down village, Tau’s deafness and child traffickers. It wouldn’t stop me from reading on, but I would be confused about the pacing of the manuscript.
[RP2] This word count is low for upper MG, especially when you’re talking about all of these really big and weighty plot elements, so again, I would be worried about the pacing here, and whether the MS had time to appropriately address everything, so I would be wary going in.

Also, here’s something I would want to know: are any aspects of this story Own Voices? If not, what research was done, and what credentials does the author have? I would want at least a short paragraph on that to have confidence. Without this information, I would have trouble reading forward.

Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] I like this title. It’s sensory, a little mysterious and compelling.
[CG2] Solid opening line of the paragraph pitch.

[CG3] I would start with a more introductory paragraph that includes the information from your final paragraph plus a one line pitch . This will provide the necessary context for the agent and also capture her attention with the big selling points (hooks) of the book.

[CG4] Interesting setting.

[CG5] Wow! Sounds like a very thrilling, high-stakes book.

[CG6] This word count is more appropriate for lower middle grade. I would have expected at least 50K for this book. A too low word count can be a red flag to an agent or editor that the book isn’t as developed as it should be.

[CG7] In your bio, I’d be interested in seeing the author’s connection to Mali and the research he/she did to make this book as authentic as possible.

First 250:

Tau’s hand trembled as he brought a match to the cornstalk.

I’m in control, he reminded himself. [CG1]

He lit the edges of a few leaves until they curled away, taking the flames with them. Burning season made him nervous. Always did.

I’m in control, he reminded himself. He flicked the withered match into the blaze and backed away. Small embers grew into a billowing fire, engulfing the stems and creeping along the field.

A light breeze tickled his neck and sent a shiver across his shoulders. Tau hurried several paces to his tree where he could sense an unexpected wind. He jumped for the larger branch and slipped, a finger width too short. So unlike his older brother. His older brother Sam could’ve climbed to the top of the tree in two leaps.

But at only twelve years old, Tau started from the bottom. He slung his arm around the first limb in reach, hoisting himself up higher and higher.

From where he perched, Tau watched the fire steadily consume the field and wrap its long fingers around the next row of cornstalks. The warmth from the flames acknowledged his work well done, but his heart still ached in protest. Only the bare stems proved his usefulness during that dry, African summer. Now their ash would feed the hungry soil. A soundless laugh pushed his chest. It was almost funny. He’d harvested the cobs and picked out the dry kernels to plant next year. Like him, the cornstalks couldn’t use their ears. And he was punishing them for it.[CG2]

**********

Clelia's Notes:
[CG1] A small change in order, but I think it makes your opening stronger, more dramatic.

[CG2] Compelling first pages and solidly written. My one thought is that the voice sounds very American from these 250 words, and not necessarily like a boy from Mali. I would be interested in seeing more of this—50 pages would be great. Please check out my submission guidelines at www.martinlit.com.

Results:
Rebecca Podos: PASS
Clelia Gore: PAGES

November Pass Or Pages Entry #1

Time for our favorite part of Pass Or Pages, the feedback reveals! We hope that everyone following along will get something out of these reveals that they can apply to their own writing. I did!
We are so grateful to our agent panel for critiquing these entries. We would also like to give a shout-out to the authors for being brave and willing to improve.

Entry #1: ZAKE ALLGOOD, DUGOUT SUPER-SPY

Query:

ZAKE ALLGOOD, DUGOUT SUPER-SPY[CG1] is a humorous middle grade mystery about how a boy's love of baseball becomes his secret weapon to conquer his fear of public speaking, expose dangerous criminals, and muster the mojo to be a hero, both on and off the mound. The book mashes the film The Sandlot, with contemporary Hardy Boys[RP1][CG2], for a 54,000-word adventure that will resonate with fans of baseball, friendship, and victory over bad guys and other obstacles in the complicated life of a twelve-year-old kid.[CG3]

Zake's got some missions unaccomplished:

1. Talk in front of 62 eyeballs without puffing into a paper bag... again.

2. Write down journal stuff[RP2], so that random thought don't spill out like a bucket of baseballs.

3. Win back the championship in a Midwest town so small that Google Maps ignored it.

He’s also on a quest for self-discovery, even though he doesn’t know it.[CG4] But when Zake and his best buddy, Campy, break curfew to work on Zake’s curveball, they spy two thugs[RP3] burying something past the outfield, and Zake’s biggest mission becomes survival. No one lets them explain; no one takes the boys seriously. But the boys know one thing is serious—the bad guys’ threat to toast any witnesses. Zake plots to expose the goons, and pours his heart into his journal—an introspective journey that Google Maps couldn’t begin to chart. Along with his best friends, Campy—a biracial catcher who views life through the lens of legendary black MLB Hall of Famer, Roy Campanella; and MJ—a friend who won’t let Zake forget his dreams while she pursues her own—Zake discovers he must take matters into his own mitt to solve his problems and the town’s mysteries with the one thing he knows best—his baseball.

**********
Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1]I wouldn’t stop reading here, necessarily, but these comps are a bit retro. I would pick a more current comp from the last few years (i.e. The Hardy Boys meets The Bubble Wrap Boy, or a more fitting contemporary MG sports book.)
[RP2]Always be clear and specific—you don’t want to waste words in a query, or give an agent any reason to doubt your storytelling ability, and even small choices like “write down journal stuff” instead of “Start a journal” send up a red flag. Again, I might not stop, but I would worry.
[RP3]I’m not crazy about this word usage because of its present day connotations, and it’s not specific—what thugs? Are they older boys? Men he recognizes as working for a shady businessman in town? Definitely be as specific as possible, so I know what story I’d be getting into, and so I don’t put it down for the wrong reasons.

Clelia's Notes:
[CG1]This title sounds young to me, so I am assuming this book is written for a lower middle grade audience, 8-10? I would clarify this in the body of the query.
[CG2]Although these references are ones that nearly everyone will know, they are a both outdated. I would consider bringing in a modern reference as well. You want to give the agent or editor the impression that this book will have modern appeal.
[CG3]Good starting paragraph that serves as a set up for your pitch. I wish more queries I received had this structure! I like how, in this paragraph, you start with a solid one-line pitch followed by an informative sentence to give me all the context I need to appreciate your pitch.
[CG4]This doesn’t quite add up for me because a “quest for self-discovery” implies self-awareness.

Overall, solid query.


First 250:

Not a whiff of trouble in the whole Ohio sky, and Keffel Stallions practice was in full swing. I stood tall on the pitcher’s mound and inhaled the warm evening air, heavy with the awesome smell of baseball—freshly-mown grass, glove leather, infield dust, and body odor stink so thick it curled my nose hairs.

My arm ached to hurl some more lightning bolts at Campy. He crouched behind home plate—a spittin’ image[RP1] of his Hall of Fame idol, Brooklyn Dodgers catcher, Roy “Campy” Campanella. He flashed a grin behind his catcher’s mask—he was ready for another jolt from my impressive fastball.

Sure, our team was only a small town travel ball squad of twelve-year-olds, but Campy and me, we were feelin’ pretty major league. We were at the top of our game, and only a few days away from our shot at winning back the championship against our arch-rivals, the Richtown Raccoons. Baseball at its best in Keffel, Ohio, and I was the fastball king of the mound.

This was heaven.

“Curveball!” hollered Coach Stone. I cringed. Coach wanted to see what else I could unpack. I adjusted my grip and snapped the ball, but my arm tightened on the release, as if it didn’t like getting tricked into a different pitch. The ball never even crossed the plate. I gritted my teeth and tried again, but missed the mark by a long shot.

My heaven was turning into H-E-double baseball bats fast.

**********
Rebecca's Notes:
[RP1]This phrase, and the spittin’/feelin’ spelling, is a little outdated, and coupled with the retro comps, would make me worry that the voice wouldn’t be fresh enough. There’s some lovely really writing in this sample! But with the outdated comps and unclear or unspecific language in the query, I might not have made it this far, because I would worry that it would carry over into your storytelling within the manuscript.

Clelia's Notes:
Your writing style is appealing and clean. My one concern is that this book feels rather old-fashioned to me –from another time (other than the Google Maps reference). I would find ways to make this book feel more modern and appropriate for today’s market.

Results:

Rebecca Podos: PASS
Clelia Gore: PASS

Pass Or Pages November 2016 Entry Form

We are now accepting entries for Pass Or Pages! Before you enter, be sure to check out the rules. This month's round of Pass Or Pages is for MG contemporary novels. The entry window closes at 6pm Eastern time on Wednesday November 9th. Good luck!

November 2016 Pass Or Pages Agent Panel

November's round of Pass Or Pages is all about Middle Grade Contemporary novels!

It's a busy time of year, and we are so grateful to our agent panel for stepping up to the plate and volunteering to judge your queries and first pages. Let's see who they are!

Clelia Gore

Martin Literary Management

It was when Clelia first read Charlotte’s Web in the first grade that she got hooked by the magic of books. Her love of children’s books carried through adulthood and she is delighted to dedicate her life to bringing quality books and stories to young (and whimsical adult!) readers. 

Clelia is originally from the suburbs of New York City. She has a bachelor’s degree in English literature from Boston College. She received her J.D. from American University, Washington College of Law and practiced law as a corporate litigator in New York City. 

In 2011, she decided to dedicate her career to books and reentered graduate school at Emerson College, where she received a master’s degree in Publishing and Writing. While she was studying publishing and taking creative writing courses at Emerson, Clelia gained firsthand experience in the publishing industry working in the children’s book division at Houghton Mifflin Harcourt and in academic books at Oxford University Press. She also taught academic writing and research courses to freshman students as a graduate student faculty member at Emerson College. 

Clelia attends writing and publishing conferences. She also sits on the board of directors for Poetry Northwest magazine. To find out more about Clelia, check out her blog at www.cleliagore.com. She also tweets tips, news and musings related to writing and publishing at @MadmoiselleClel.

Rebecca Podos

Rees Literary Agency

Rebecca Podos is a graduate of the MFA Writing, Literature and Publishing program at Emerson College. Her debut YA novel The Mystery of Hollow Places was recently published by Balzer+Bray (HarperCollins). Rebecca is interested exclusively in Young Adult and Middle Grade fiction; particularly books about complex female relationships, beautifully written contemporary, romance with more at stake than "will they/won't they," genre fiction with a strong focus on character, books featuring marginalized voices and cultures, and LGBTQIA stories across all genres. At the moment, she’d especially love a gender-swapped fairy tale or myth retelling, a STEM oriented MG, stories featuring multi-generational family relationships, a Gothic mystery, or a non-western inspired fantasy. 

Details for November 2016 Pass or Pages:

Entry starts: Monday, November 7, 2016, at 6 a.m. Eastern
Ends: Wednesday, November 9, 2016 at 6 p.m. Eastern
Category/Genre: Middle Grade Contemporary. All others will be deleted! Don't try to call your YA Middle Grade--we'll know!
How To Enter: Fill out the entry form on the contest post when it goes live.
What Is Required: Your query (NO BIO or personalization for agents), your first 250 words, a complete and polished MS.

You can also read more about the rules here.


The winning entries with agent commentary will be posted on Operation Awesome the week of November 21st, one entry each day. If you aren't comfortable with having your entry (which will be anonymous) shared on the blog, please don't enter Pass or Pages!

If you have any questions, please ask in the comments or feel free to tweet @OpAwesome6. Also, feel free to chat about the contest with fellow participants on the hashtag #PassOrPages.