Always Know Yourself Before...

During my trip to New York, I saw a lot of interesting sites, and had a great conference experience at Book Expo America.

Before visiting the city, I had a chance to go to Caffe Lena in Saratoga Springs, where the likes of Bob Dylan and other folk musicians have performed. That night, it was a unique blend of blues--sliding guitar, tuba, and trombone. But most fascinating was what I encountered in the bathroom:

"Always know yourself before making a decision that may change your life"

While the walls were covered in inspirational quotes, I picked this one above the others because it's so deceptively simple: "Always know yourself before making a decision that may change your life." Because better decisions are made when you have your own best interests in mind. And knowing what those interests are is key in determining whether a decision is a good fit.

As with anything, this can be applied to writing at all levels:

Crafting stage: When you are still in the process of editing your work, and getting it critiqued by others, make sure feedback resonates with the story you want to write. Don't assume that someone knows more than you, or that negative feedback means you have to change the story entirely.

How to Know Yourself: Think, reflect, and figure out which feedback resonates with you most. Be with it for awhile to see what sticks and what doesn't. That way, you can save having to revert to a previous draft when someone else's recommendations aren't working (though this isn't unheard of--I've had to do it myself).

Agented/publishing/selling stage: From what I understand, this can be a perilous stage because it involves a lot of waiting. And waiting can inevitably morph into unnecessarily questioning yourself. Or settling for a deal that might not be right for you in the long run in order to relieve immediate stress.

How to Know Yourself: Be sure of the direction you want your career to go. Make the decisions that honor that, even if it means waiting to see yourself in print. Because settling for something lesser means possibly having to undo it later on--and that isn't always an option.

What about you? In what ways do you know yourself? And how do these inform your decisions going forward? 

Writer Reunion

A few Saturdays ago, I had a chance to catch up with a lovely group of writer friends that I met last year through the Northern Ohio SCBWI annual conference. Many of us are now friends on Twitter and relished to have the chance to talk to each other in more than 140 characters at a time.

I think I stayed at the dinner table with most of them for about six hours!

All of us are on different points in our writing journey. Some are querying. One is one the verge of representation. A few of us are on sub. Some have had only one agent. A couple of us are in our second agent partnership. A few of us are still working on the same manuscript we workshopped at last year’s conference and others have written at least two new manuscripts. (I won’t tell you which category I fall under.) But no matter where we are, it is all various degrees of fascinating and frustrating and wonderful and mind-boggling.

At one point, a member of our group said, “It’s funny to see how our perspectives change with time. How decisions we’d make as newer writers on this journey aren’t decisions we’d make today.”

It was an interesting point. In three years time, I do feel like I’ve grown up a lot in my writing journey. I’ve mellowed out. I’ve learned not to obsess so much over things that are out of my control. I’ve figured out when to write an email to my agent and hit SAVE DRAFT rather than SEND. And how to be ok with my own process rather than trying to make someone else’s process work for me.

I’m sure this feeling of maturity and wisdom will evaporate when I enter uncharted territory. But for now, I like the fact that I’ve gained some perspective through the ups and downs of being a newbie in the world of publishing. I’m looking forward to hearing how careers and insights have changed during next year’s writer reunion. Until then, I’ll keep tabs on everyone’s journey from a distance, usually documented in 140 characters or less.

 How has your perspective of writing/publishing changed from year to year? Is there a group of writers with whom you collectively mark the passage of time?

-- Kellie DuBay Gillis