Dear O'Abby: How do I write realistic characters?

 Dear O'Abby,

I have been working on a novel for several years now, and was finally brave enough to hand it over to my writing group for critique and several of the group members have come back saying my characters don't feel real and that they struggled to tell them apart.  The book is based on something that happened to me a few years back and the characters are based on the people who were involved in that event.  Obviously I've changed names and in some cases melded two people into one to protect their identities, but I feel like they are quite distinct.  But maybe that's because I know they are?  

My question is, how do I make characters more realistic and distinct?  Do you have any tips that might help me?

Kind regards,

Baffled

Dear Baffled,

There are lots of things you can do to make your characters feel like real, well rounded humans who exist in your story world as individuals.  You say your characters are based on real people, so think about who these people are and what makes them THEM.  Everyone is a product of their upbringing and influences and experiences, so to create realistic, well rounded characters, you need to think about their lives before your story begins and what brought them to that place at that time.

People are not perfect either, so giving your characters flaws will help to make them feel more real.  Some people have a temper and fly off the handle at the smallest thing.  Others may have a bleak or cynical view of the world and respond negatively to everything.  Some people are trusting to a fault and find it difficult to accept it if someone disappoints them in some way.  There are so many different flaws people can have, and often one thing leads to another, layering flaw upon flaw.

People also have different ways of speaking, so dialogue can be a really good way to make characters distinct.  Some people have pet phrases or words they use (or misuse) constantly while others may speak more (or less) formally.  Giving each character a unique voice can go a long way toward distinguishing them from each other.  Again, think about their backgrounds when writing their dialogue.  Someone who is very religious may not use real swear words, but make things up when they need an expletitive.  Someone who grew up speaking another language may have a different rhythm to their speech than someone who is native to English.

As well as distinct speech patterns, people have specific mannerisms.  Some people bite their nails when they're nervous, or pick at their cuticles.  Some people keep their hands in their pockets to hide the fact their fingers tremble.  Someone with bad teeth (or who used to have bad teeth) might raise their hand to their mouth before smiling.  All these small gestures can be incorporated into your characterisation and will help to make the inhabitants of your story feel real and well-rounded.

Also, look at the way they react and interact with other characters.  In a group, people respond differently to different people.  They may be more or less guarded, use different body language or speak differently.  If there is a power dynamic within the group, this will be be particularly obvious in the way those with less power act toward those they perceive as having more.

It is also important that each character has a purpose.  Even when the overarching goal is the same for a group, every individual has their own wants and needs that will dictate the way they respond to events and how they go about working toward that shared goal.

Go through your manuscript with an eye out specifically for these things and you will probably find multiple opportunities for deepening and expanding your characters.  You may also want to write some back story for each of them so you know where they're coming to your story from. This never needs to be made public, but can be a useful tool in fleshing out your characters.  

I hope that's helpful

 X O'Abby

Dear O'Abby: How do I do better world-building in my book?

 Dear O'Abby,

I just got my MS back from a group of readers and need some help.  All of them liked the story and the characters and the overall structure of the book, but they all mentioned that they felt the world-building was weak.

Now this is confusing because my book is contemporary and is set in an imaginary, but very typical modern, western city.  Think anywhere from London to Chicago to Sydney.  Any of them could be the setting for this book.  Or even smaller cities - anywhere with suburbs, more than one public high school, a public transport system etc.

I always thought world building was something that really only applied to fantasy or sci-fi or historical books where the reader needs to understand the landscape, politics etc.  I didn't think a contemporary book set in a place most readers will recognise needed much world building.

What do my readers mean?

Kind regards,

World-weary

Dear World-weary,

World building is talked about most in relation to genres where the story setting may not be familiar, but even books set in the real, modern world need a degree of world building to feel real.  You can assume that the majority of readers are familiar with cities, but I think what your readers are commenting on is a lack of specific details that will make your fictional city feel real.

Things like the weather.  A hot, dry city is very different to one where it rains almost daily.  Something as simple as knowing the weather patterns for your city will affect the way your characters dress, travel and behave.  As will the landscapes. For example, if one of your characters walks or cycles everywhere, the experience will be very different in a city built on hills than one built on the flat.  How the characters spend their leisure time can also be affected by the landscape surrounding them.  If there is a lake and it's summer, they probably hang out there and swim or boat or fish.  The same if the city is on the coast and there's a beach.

Or maybe they don't.  Maybe the beach is there, but your character hates the way sand gets everywhere and the way salt air feels on her skin so she never goes.  

You don't need to tell your reader everything about the city, but a few well-placed details create a world that feels authentic and this makes your characters, who live and engage with this world, more authentic too.  If a character is getting anxious waiting for a bus because they have to get to an urgent appointment on time, you could throw in a mention of the city's re-organisation of the public transport system and how unreliable it has become as a result.  This not only provides added context for the character's anxiety, but also gives depth to the world in which they live.

Other small details that can add texture to the fabric of your world are sounds and smells.  Writers often forget to engage all their characters' senses as they move through stories.  In real life we all gather information about the world we move through by sensing things as well as seeing them.  An interesting exercise is to describe the place you're in, or a place you know well, without using the sense of sight.  How much can you show using only things you can hear, smell or feel?

It's the small details that make the setting compelling, and by focusing on the details your character would be most conscious of, you're not just building a world, but your character's world.  How they interact and react within it also builds the character and makes them more authentic too.

I hope that helps. 

Best of luck with your revision!

X O'Abby

P.S.  Here are a couple of books that might be of interest to you: 

Preparing to Write Settings That Feel Like Characters

The Urban Setting Thesaurus: A Writer's Guide to City Spaces (Writers Helping Writers Series Book 5)

Serenading the Wicked Heart: An Ode to Villains

Good villains require a lot of development so they don't become flat, cliche stereotypes. Villains, like ogres, should have layers. There are different types of villains, but my favorite are sympathetic villains. These characters might be just a decision or two away from being a hero, and we might be a decision or two away from being them. To me, that's fascinating.

One of my favorite sympathetic villains is Scorpius from the Sci-Fi channel series Farscape. He seeks the same goal as the hero John Crichton, but his methods for getting it are decidedly more evil and underhanded than John's. Scorpius has physical weaknesses that hinder him, but he uses his intellect to overcome them. This flaw has created a lot of Scorpi's determination and taught him internal strength, building a villain I would side with if it wasn't for the golden-hearted boy-next-door John Crichton.

quick Rumple sketch by Donelle Lacy

On the fringes of villainy, you'll find another character I absolutely love. The Trickster character. He's slippery, seductive, and you never know what side he's on. Rumpelstiltskin from Once Upon A Time is both
a villain and a trickster. His fingers are in everything and he's constantly three steps ahead of the other characters. He has a sympathetic backstory as well as circumstances in which he might be either truly evil or unusually kind.

After reading Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman, I was charmed by the Marquis De Carabas. The long coat, the hat, the flashy smile, seemed more at home in a Louisiana gin joint than the Underground of London, but he fit perfectly. Gaiman played on all the traditional trickster qualities and produced a character who walks that fine line between reader trust and distrust. You're compelled to read on and find out more about him.

What we love most about villains and tricksters is that they do and say the things heroes never could. They cross lines, break hearts, and pull rugs out from under everyone else. They're shifty, sneaky, and clever in ways we wish we could be. They don't have to play fair, but they're seldom very happy for long. So they become tragic figures we secretly wish would come out on top. And in some stories, they do.

Writing villains requires inspiration, motivation, and a deep appreciation for the slipperier critters of the literary world. Without a well-developed villain, a hero would never know how bold, brave, or strong he could be, nor would he be motivated to find out. Villains, more than heroes, are fantastic motivators. If you don't believe me, consider the relationship between Sherlock Holmes and Moriarty, the Doctor and the Master, Batman and the Joker. The more compelling the villain is, the more the hero has to step up his game, and thus the hero becomes legendary.

When you're writing your villains, peel back the layers and get to the heart of why they are who they are. What made them that way? What/who do they love? And what steps would they take against someone who threatened that love?

What makes a book GREAT: a look at THEIR EYES WERE WATCHING GOD

In addition to #OABOOKCLUB, which is reading EMMA by JANE AUSTEN this month, I also sometimes take part in a local meet-up to have dessert and talk literature with some lovely ladies. Last month we read THEIR EYES WERE WATCHING GOD by ZORA NEALE HURSTON.

It's an amazing book, and I want to talk about what makes it great, what made Alice Walker tromp through an old, snake-infested cemetery looking for the author's unmarked gravestone so she could replace it with a decent memorial, and what made some old, out-of-print novel make a comeback so many years after the author's death.

~

“It is so easy to be hopeful in the daytime when you can see the things you wish on. But it was night, it stayed night. Night was striding across nothingness with the whole round world in his hands . . . They sat in company with the others in other shanties, their eyes straining against cruel walls and their souls asking if He meant to measure their puny might against His. They seemed to be staring at the dark, but their eyes were watching God.”

~

Goodreads

When Janie, at sixteen, is caught kissing shiftless Johnny Taylor, her grandmother swiftly marries her off to an old man with sixty acres. Janie endures two stifling marriages before meeting the man of her dreams, who offers not diamonds, but a packet of flowering seeds ...
'For me, THEIR EYES WERE WATCHING GOD is one of the very greatest American novels of the 20th century. It is so lyrical it should be sentimental; it is so passionate it should be overwrought, but it is instead a rigorous, convincing and dazzling piece of prose, as emotionally satisfying as it is impressive. There is no novel I love more.' Zadie Smith

Reading Zora Hurston's book was a rich cultural experience for me, one that made me laugh and cry with the people. 

It was culturally rich because she put so much of her own cultural heritage into it. Parts of it even seem autobiographical. For instance, there's a line where one of the main characters jokes that Janie's greatest sin is taking a few years off her age, and that never hurt anybody. This little line has more meaning when you realize that Zora Hurston herself took ten years off her life at the age of 26 so she could go back to high school. She never added those years back on, but from thence forth was ten years younger than herself. You can imagine that the maturity she took with her into her education gave a dawn-light to every master and principle she studied, and made her appreciate the impact she could have on the world through writing. 

Part of the cultural richness is the language:

"Then you must tell 'em dat love ain't somethin' lak uh grindstone dat's de same thing everywhere and do de same thing tuh everything it touch. Love is lak de sea. It's uh movin' thing, but still and all, it takes its shape from de shore it meets, and it's different with every shore."

~

“If you kin see de light at daybreak, you don't keer if you die at dusk. It's so many people never seen de light at all.”

Part of it is the way the characters interact with one another in the community, mostly around the store porch where gossip, philosophical debate, and fighting all shape the relationships and thus the society in which Janie lives. When she's allowed to partake in these shaping conversations vs. when she feels silenced by a mayor-husband, that makes all the difference in Janie's happiness and sense of purpose. 

“...she starched and ironed her face, forming it into just what people wanted to see...”

In the beginning, it's the silly stories and this, for me, alien culture that keep the book from dragging during a time of Janie's life when she's really not allowed to be all that interesting. The ripening wisdom she attains, even through the suffocating ages of oppression she chooses to endure, turns her into someone you can't help but love.

“She had an inside and an outside now and suddenly she knew how not to mix them.”

It's in the poetry of the book, foolish toward the beginning, and then wise toward the end, that you see Janie's character develop best.

“She was stretched on her back beneath the pear tree soaking in the alto chant of the visiting bees, the gold of the sun and the panting breath of the breeze when the inaudible voice of it all came to her. She saw a dust-bearing bee sink into the sanctum of a bloom; the thousand sister-calyxes arch to meet the love embrace and the ecstatic shiver of the tree from root to tiniest branch creaming in every blossom and frothing with delight.”

~ 

“Oh to be a pear tree – any tree in bloom! With kissing bees singing of the beginning of the world!”

~ 

"She didn't read books so she didn't know that she was the world and the heavens boiled down to a drop."

~ 

“Janie looked down on him and felt a self-crushing love. So her soul crawled out from its hiding place.”

~ 

“Ships at a distance have every man's wish on board. For some they come in with the tide. For others they sail forever on the same horizon, never out of sight, never landing until the Watcher turns his eyes away in resignation, his dreams mocked to death by Time. That is the life of men. Now, women forget all those things they don't want to remember, and remember everything they don't want to forget. The dream is the truth. Then they act and do things accordingly.”

Race was naturally woven through the story, but the people were just people. They could grow or stagnate according to their own choices.

While there were commentaries from different characters on race and racial divisions, the characters themselves were drawn as simply human- all of them. You could feel the regret in each character when he or she acted against conscience. You could see the very human justification happening in their minds and hearts, and occasionally one or another would choose to change despite his self-justification. A triumph of humanity! The most tragic character, in my view, was the one who wouldn't be changed. I won't give it away here, but Janie laments at the end of his life that he wanted to change the world but wouldn't have the world change him. 

Each story surprised me with its genuine quality, no matter how bizarre (vulture parson at a carcass funeral). 

There's a bizarre story about a mule carcass being dragged out of town ceremoniously, which ends with vultures presiding over their own sort of ceremony, complete with a vulture parson who does an investigation of the carcass before every other vulture can partake. As silly as this all sounds, it has a poetic aspect in the writing of Zora Hurston, and it makes you feel it all really happened.

I was tickled by the personalities brushing up against each other, for good or ill. What really made the stories was the way the people reacted to one another, like the lazy townsfolk who greet Janie's second husband with surprise when he asks to see their mayor. They hadn't even gotten up to thinking about electing a mayor, much less imagining they'd be allotted a post office by the government for their little not-quite-a-town. Janie's and Jody's coming to Eatonville flips the town upside down, or right-side up! And while many of the people respond gratefully, others are jealous and petty from the start. 

Later on when Janie has completely different adventures with her third husband and she's fully invested in her life, she doesn't seem as affected by the foibles of the other characters. That's part of her later-life wisdom, to let everyone be who they are. It's in this part of the book that I really started to enjoy myself and let the lessons of human weakness and human strength and human connection just sink into my soul. 

Most of all, the poetry at certain parts elevated my spirit. I felt improved for having read it.

Beautiful language is only half of poetry. The other half is depth of meaning. Zora Neale Hurston is a true poet. 

"There is a basin in the mind where words float around on thought and thought on sound and sight. Then there is a depth of thought untouched by words, and deeper still a gulf of formless feelings untouched by thought."

~

"Her old thoughts were going to come in handy now, but new words would have to be made and said to fit them."

 ~

 So, to sum up, WHAT MAKES A BOOK GREAT?

• Rich cultural backdrop that is alive and breathing through characters and community
• Poetry, and tone, that evolves with the character through her arc
• The people aren't stereotypes, but regular people
• Each story feels true, no matter how bizarre, and lessons of human nature and connection come through in the narrative
• The reader's spirit is elevated, her life better for having read it

What do you think it is that makes a book truly great?

For more of the story of Alice Walker and the cemetery or Zora Hurston and the missing ten years on her age, check out the book from the library and read the forewords and afterwords.