The Query Outline

I was recently chatting with a writer friend about their query package, and lemme tell you, putting a query package together is such a bother. It's difficult - nearly impossible sometimes, even - to get good feedback on it. You certainly don't get any from the agents you query. And everywhere you look, there's conflicting advice.

So I'm going to dish out some more.

When I was querying, one of my biggest struggles was figuring out how much of the plot to include. I knew I'd be explaining it all in the synopsis, which is more of an emotionless summary of the book's events, and the query is supposed to read like the book jacket blurb. I tried reading some blurbs to generate ideas, but they all seemed too dramatic - more on the side of a lengthy Twitter pitch event tweet than a brief summary. Trying to read other people's query letters wasn't much help either. Some people wrote lengthy page-long dealios, and other people barely had ten sentences. I was tearing my hair out. I just wanted a happy medium, darnit!

I ended up settling somewhere in the middle, landing on two paragraphs of plot and two paragraphs of other query content. Here's my basic outline:

1. Summary paragraph 1: This paragraph sets up the world, the stakes, and the inciting incident. It ends around the end of Act One, when the MC makes some specific choice that defines the rest of the story.
2. Summary paragraph 2: The paragraph summarizes the consequences of the choice the MC makes at the end of Act One. It ends approximately where Act Two ends, when the MC has to give up on their previous want and adjust, or continue to struggle toward something they will never achieve. It should end on a cliffhanger. 
3. Metadata: This paragraph contains all the info about my manuscript - the title, length, genre, and relevant hashtags (#OwnVoices, #BlackGirlMagic, etc.) along with comp titles. Comp titles are in ALL CAPS, and I also like to mention why I'm using them ("the political intrigue of SHADOWCASTER meets the love triangle of LIKE A LOVE STORY"). It's also worth mentioning why I'm querying this agent in particular ("your bio mentioned an interest in books like the TV show REIGN"). 
4. Bio: All about me! My background, my education, why I'm qualified to write this, why I'm passionate about this story. 

All in all, my query was about three-quarters of a page, give or take, including my introduction and sign-off. A query should definitely not be more than a page, and I'd say limit your summary to three paragraphs. Any longer than that and you're venturing into synopsis territory, and we know how territorial they can be.

Now go forth and storm the query trenches!

#AtoZChallenge Understanding #PassOrPages

Understanding #PassOrPages

#PassOrPages is Operation Awesome's query contest. The goal is to help writers get feedback on their query and first page, and possibly link them up with an agent who likes their work.

Three times a year, we choose a genre and age category and reach out to agents who might be interested in those manuscripts. Once we have our agent panel, we open up the contest to writers. Anyone can send in their query and first page, as long as they fit the genre and age category.

(Why only the first page? That could be as little as an agent reads, and we've even had agents stop after the first sentence. If they're not intrigued, they're not going to keep reading, so that first page is the most vital to the query package.)

Winners are randomly drawn and their work is sent to the agent panel. The participating agents give brief feedback on the entries and explain why they're passing on the work, or requesting pages. You can find our #PassOrPages archive with all our past contests here.

We began this contest because sometimes - okay, most of the time - the agenting process seems inscrutable. What do all those rejection letters mean when they say "I just didn't fall in love with it"? By asking agents specifically to critique the basic query package, we hope that all writers, not just those whose work is critiqued, will gain insight into what goes through an agent's mind when they read the query and first page. Here are some of the most common comments from the past three years of #PassOrPages, and how you can adjust your work accordingly:

• Awkward phrasing. Read your query and first page aloud, or paste them into Google Translate and hit the "listen" button. Sometimes hearing things aloud sets off those problem spots that you don't catch when you're reading, especially when you've read that page a hundred times already. Keep in mind that the query should read like the inside of a book jacket.
• Too many grammar/spelling mistakes. One grammar/spelling mistake is too many in your query package. Proofread, proofread, and proofread again. Have a friend, coworker, CP, beta, whoever, look at your pages before you send them.
• Cut words/sentences. In your query and first page, keep prose tight and to the point. This isn't the time for flowery language, this is prime real estate! The first page is the time to show that your work is worth reading, not that you know how to write. Ask yourself, "Is this as concise as I can be?" Cut words like "just," "had," and instances of passive voice. If a sentence isn't advancing the plot, cut it.
• Tone of the pages doesn't match tone of the query. This is a tough one. Try writing your query as if your main character wrote it - not necessarily as if they're telling their story, but write with their voice. 
• Cut rhetorical question. Rhetorical questions are ALWAYS a bad idea. Whether it's a query, the opening line of your manuscript, or a Twitter pitch, rhetorical questions are not something agents want to see. They don't give you any new information or advance the plot in any way, and they're typically used as a crutch when writers don't know how to bring up the topic at hand. Just delete the question and dive straight in - you'll be surprised how well the story works without it.
• Main character reads too old/too young for the age category. Maybe you've simply mis-categorized your work as MG when it should be YA. Maybe your character really doesn't act their age and you need to talk to some people that age to find out how they would act. I wish I had more advice to give about this one, but this is much more specific to a particular work. 
• Keep similes and metaphor to a minimum. Most often, similes and metaphors aren't in the writer's own words (quiet as a mouse, all the world's a stage, etc.). One is enough for the first page, since you want to keep the agent's focus on your words.

The first #PassOrPages of 2019 is coming up next month. Keep an eye out for our genre reveal on April 30!

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 3/17 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 2/17 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 2/3 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 1/20 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 11/18 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

#QueryFriday

It's that time again, everybody! Enter here for a chance to win a query critique by yours truly! Here's how to participate:

1. Comment on this post and at least one other post from this week by *SUNDAY 11/4 at 12 pm*.

2. Leave your email address in the comment or have it available on your Blogger profile. (Or else I can't find you!)

The winner will be announced in the comment section of this post on Sunday.

See this post for additional rules. Good luck!

-Nathaniel

Blast From the Past #3

It's November. It's NaNoWriMo. I'm an ML this year. I got revision notes back from my agent last month that I'm still working on. My husband is completely renovating our living room, right before we have a bunch of family in town for Thanksgiving. Something's gotta give, and this month it's new content for Operation Awesome. So I've picked through some of my old posts and picked out a few to feature this month.

Today I'm revisiting one of my favorite topics: Query letters! This post isn't about how to write query letters, but when to write query letters.

Before You Send Your Query Letter

I'm waving at you from beneath the huge pile of virtual papers we refer to as the slush pile. It's massive. It's overwhelming. And yet, I know that it's also a pile of the hopes and dreams of writers like me and you.

When I approach the slush pile, it's with the hope of finding a gem that my company can bring to publication. I strive to give everyone a fair chance. However, time is not only valuable, but it's scarce. I can't devote a half hour to every submission. The pile would grow faster than I could pare it down. Writers only get a couple of minutes to grab my attention. While this can be disconcerting, I believe knowledge is power.

Put yourself the acquisition editor's or literary agent's shoes. What would you want to know about the story? What's most important about your manuscript and you as the author? Get them that important information as quickly as possible.

Here are a few things I want to know right away:

• Genre
• Target audience
• Word count
• Title

Surprisingly, these items are missing from many submissions I receive. To make matters worse, many writers don't read our submission guidelines to know we don't publish adult fiction, picture books, or non-Canadian writers. These folks are wasting my time and theirs by submitting. The Golden Rule applies. If you were the person feverishly going through hundreds of submissions, what types of submissions would you want to receive?

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When Melinda Marshall Friesen isn't writing, she works as marketing director and acquisitions editor at Rebelight Publishing.

When Should You Write Your Query Letter?

I don't know about you folks out there, but I didn't learn what a query letter was until after I wrote my first book and revised it a few times. Somehow I got it in my head that a query letter could only be written in the weeks before you sent your book out to agents or publishers. If your book wasn't written, polished, and ready to go, you couldn't write that query letter.

How wrong I was...

Earlier this year, I won a query critique from an agent in a random Twitter giveaway. I was a couple weeks away from finishing the first draft of my MS, so of course I hadn't already written my query letter.

Commence scrambling.

Now, to be fair, I've gotten a lot better at query letters over the past few years, so writing this particular query letter wasn't as soul-crushing as previous ones have been. I came up with a rough draft, workshopped it with my Facebook writing group, polished it up, sent it to a CP with notoriously quick turnaround time, then sent it on to the agent who gave me a thumbs up and a request for pages. I let her know (sheepishly) that the book wasn't finished yet, but that I'd send the pages on eventually.

The thing that astonished me most, however, was that in the process of writing the query letter, I discovered that the conflict and stakes of my manuscript were weak. So I made something up that my writing group agreed was much stronger. Then, when I went back to do my first revision on my novel, I was able to add the key scenes that I needed to increase the conflict and therefore the stakes.

Now I recommend to everyone that they write a query letter for their novels somewhere between the beginning of the first draft and the start of the first revision. That way, if the query letter reveals that an aspect of the book needs work, you are in the perfect position to fix it.

When do you write your query letter? Have you tried this before? Let me know in the comments!

Query-Writing 101: Writing a Basic Query

Writing a query is tough.

You've just spent months agonizing over a manuscript of 50, 75, or 100,000 words and now you're expected to reduce that down to a succinct, attention-grabbing pitch of just 250 words? No wonder writers stress out about it!

There are many blog posts and articles out there about how to write a good novel* query, including:

• "The Complete Guide to Query Letters that Get Manuscript Requests," by Jane Friedman
• "How to Write a Query Letter," by agent Rachelle Gardner
• "Example of a Good Query Letter," by agent Nathan Bradford
• The entire Query Shark blog (yes, read the whole blog) by agent Janet Reid
• "The Complete Nobody's Guide to Writing a Query Letter," by Lynn Flewelling
• "Ask a Literary Agent: What Do You Look for in a Query Letter," by Lauren Sharp
• and for you visual learners, "How to Write a Query Letter," video by writer Emily Lowrey

With so much information, it can be kind of overwhelming. Today, to ease some writer anxiety, I'm going to try to break it down as simply as possible.

1. SALUTATION

Take the time to research the agents you're querying and open with "Dear [insert agent name here]:"

2. PERSONALIZATION [if applicable]

• IF you have a referral from another industry professional whom this agent knows personally...
• IF you met the agent at a conference or other event...
• IF the agent has requested materials from you for a prior manuscript...

then put that information here. Otherwise skip this and dive right into telling them about your manuscript.**

3. PITCH
3A. Your main character & their goal

The first paragraph should tell the agent who your main character is and what s/he wants at the beginning of the novel. I find it useful in the "pitch" section to write this information in the absolute simplest form first and then add more detail.

• SIMPLE: Emma wants to be a matchmaker.
• DETAILS: Twenty-year-old Emma Woodhouse doesn't mind a life of spinsterhood. She has a loving father, plentiful wealth, and finds great pleasure in bettering the lives of her neighbors and friends. After successfully finding a husband for her beloved governess, she sets her sights on helping the others in her life find their perfect marital happiness as well.

3B. The inciting incident & conflict

Your inciting incident (which should take place in the first chapter or two of your novel) should create some sort of conflict for your main character.

• SIMPLE: Emma tries to set up Harriet with Mr. Elton, BUT Mr. Elton likes her.
• DETAILS: When she meets Harriet Smith, a plain girl from unknown parentage, Emma decides that Harriet is the perfect match for the village rector and sets out to ensure that they fall in love. To do so, she must keep Harriet from the humble farmer who's already begun to win her affection and introduce her new friend into higher, more worthy society. It all seems to be falling into place, until Emma discovers that the rector whom she intended for Harriet has taken a liking to her instead.

3C. The stakes

The stakes are what the characters stand to lose, what they will miss out on or what will be destroyed if they do not achieve their goal.

• SIMPLE: Emma must admit her mistake or they all will be unhappy.
• DETAILS: As her attempts at matchmaking only cause more and more awkward misunderstandings between the pair of women and the men whose affection they've won, Emma must give up her matchmaking and admit her errors, or there will be no happy endings for anyone involved.

4. BOOKKEEPING

Here's where you want to put the "business details"

• category (MG, YA, NA, Adult) 
• genre
• word count (rounded to the nearest thousand)
• any relevant biographical information (membership in a national writers organization, participation in a major writers' workshop such as Clarion, education or experience relating to writing)

5. CLOSING

Include your contact information here

• your legal name ("writing as [pen name]," if applicable)
• your mailing address
• your phone number
• your website (if applicable)

Once you've got your basic structure, you're ready to add details, polish it up, and get some fellow writers to critique it. Check in tomorrow for my checklist of query dos and don'ts!

*queries/pitches for nonfiction and children's literature follows different formats
** Some agents prefer the "bookkeeping" info up front; others prefer it last. If they say one way or the other in their guidelines, then follow their guidelines. If not, then it can go either place. For the sake of this simple outline, I include it at the end.

Writing Series: Querying, Four Great Query Resources

Writing a successful query letter is an art form. It's a skill that requires instruction as well as practice to hone those skills.

I could fill this post with advice on query letter writing, but I won't. Better, more experienced people than me have already written volumes on this subject, so my job today is to point you in the right direction.

I've been querying for years and have come across a few resources that have been helpful to me. When I first started, I couldn't get an agent's attention to save my life, but by honing my query writing craft, I've been successful in garnering requests for full manuscripts. So, here are some of my favourite resources.

1.  Nathan Bransford's blog. An author and former literary agent, Bransford shares a treasure trove of
query writing advice. The thing I liked most about this site is his upbeat attitude. He doesn't try to discourage writers with the dismal odds that are against them, but conveys information with a you-can-do-it attitude.

2. Query Shark. Literary agent, Janet Reid, runs this no-nonsense blog that walks writers through examples of lackluster queries and how to fix them. There are hundreds of examples available, and I encourage you to read through as many as possible.

3. Agent Query. Again, tons of information and advice about query letters and literary agents. This website has a database of agents, what they represent and if they're open for submissions. There is also a sister site called Agent Query Connect, a forum where writers can network and post queries for critique. My warning with receiving critique at AQ Connect is that it's often the blind leading the blind. Many have yet to write a successful query themselves.

4.  Writer's Digest New Agent Alerts. This site shares information about new agents or agents who have transitioned to new firms and are actively building their client lists.

Once you have a stellar query letter and a list of agents who represent your type of work and who you would like to work alongside, you're ready to start querying.

If you have any questions, please post them below.

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Melinda Friesen writes novels for teens and short stories for all ages. Her first novel, Enslavement, was released in November of 2014 by Rebelight Publishing Inc. She lives in Winnipeg,Manitoba Canada with her husband and four children.